DEATH, DIVORCE AND MOVING are the three most stressful experiences

in life. There are two very different kinds of needs that people have

while moving no matter what the reason is for moving. 

 

First there are the transactional needs, like finding

the home that is just right for you, finding a seller who is

realistic, negotiating the price, filling out the paperwork, handling

the exchange, and arranging for the move.

 

But there are also emotional

needs that are involved when moving, and this is where the biggest

stress comes in. Any competent agent will handle the sale

needs for you, but if your emotional needs are unfulfilled, you'll be

frustrated and may not act in your own best interests.

The ideal real estate agent is one who is competent with paperwork

and numbers, but can also guide, direct, and counsel you through the

emotional ups and downs of moving.

Here are the six best ways we've found to beat the

stress.

1. Begin with the end in mind.

 

 Have an ultimate scenario of where you're trying to go.

What will life be like when you get there? How

will it be better than where you are now? Dwell on that picture and

write it out, fill up at least a page about how it feels in the new

place. This is imperative. Having your goal in front of you at all

times energizes you to achieve it, in spite of setbacks and

frustrations. Emotions will run high and you will need an anchor. In

childbirth, the Lamaze method teaches you to focus on one spot when

enduring labour pains. In the same way, you too must focus on that

future goal when anxiety threatens to get the better of you.

2. Be flexible.

 

In your financial calculations, over-estimate by at least one

thousand dollars. In this market, anything can happen between

acceptance and exchange. It could be the inspections reveal areas of

concern that the seller is unwilling to fix or the repair costs are

higher than the amount limited in the contract. Or the interest rate

changes. You should strive to tie up loose ends as quickly as possible,

but remember there is no perfect world. Most buyers feel a bit overwhelmed

when taking on a new mortgage and the responsibilities of a new home and

we've seen many buyers get angry when it seems like the cost just keeps going up.

Anger is caused when reality doesn't match up with the expectations

you had in your mind. So if you anticipate this happening in advance,

you won't get angry. In fact, it'll probably go better than you

expected.

3. Trust in the process.

 

 There's just so much to do, it's easy to panic.

You wonder if it will ever work out.

In fact, when we bought our house, we couldn't eat for a day,

we felt sick to our stomachs!

You think you're taking a big chance, but the truth is you're giving

yourself a big chance. Even though you can't see every step of the

way, as you move towards your goals, the way opens up.

You haven't moved in a long time and it's a major upheaval in your

life.

 

4. Get knowledge.

One thing you'll probably feel during this

transition time is being out of control. It feels like everyone else

has taken over your life. The seller, your lender, the appraiser, the

inspectors, they all have the power to say yes or no to your moving

plans. Try to work out ahead of time what your

expenses will be, and what the unknowns are. Tie down the loose

ends as soon as possible. Try to get your loan approved within

a reasonable time frame.

5. What is your option?

 

 When things don't go as smoothly as you had

hoped, don't let emotions take over. Always ask yourself "What is my

option?" because there are always options. Let's pretend the lender

takes longer than agreed upon to get your loan. He keeps asking you

for more and more documentation until if feels like he also needs to

know how many gold fillings you have in your mouth! You'll feel upset

because you wanted to feel certain about the move and now you still

have to live with the uncertainty. You want to say "Forget it, I'm fed

up with this!" But what is your option? Find a new lender and start

the process over again? That may take weeks, plus you will have to

provide all the paperwork over again. If the lender is trying his

best, it may be better to give him a few more days. Each case is

unique, but when setbacks occur we've found that asking yourself this

question helps to defuse the situation and restore clear headed

thinking.

6. Seek entertainment.

 

When there's nothing you can do about the

situation, take your mind off of it altogether. Maybe you expected

loan approval on Friday, but now it won't come until Monday. You hate

being in limbo and feeling powerless. So do something else entirely,

maybe something where you aren't powerless. Take a hike, play tennis,

get out of town for the day. Watch a movie or pour yourself into your

work. Whatever diversion works best for you, now would be a good time

to engage in it. Just forget the situation and refuse to listen to

those irritating thoughts when they come into your head. Think about

something else instead and just take it one day at a time. To keep

stress to a minimum, here's how to work in buying your new home:

Get expert counsel and advice with your best interests in mind.

Clarify your goals and motivation, and decide if moving is the wisest choice

at this time. Get recommendations and information to help your kids through all

the changes. Negotiate effectively to get the lowest possible

price for your new home.. Protect your interests during exchange, keeping

a detailed record of the transaction. Have someone as a levelheaded sounding

board or relief valve when the stress is overwhelming. Be aware

through the feelings of "buyer's remorse". Keep a list for things like movers,

change of address, utilities disconnection, cleaning etc. The more organised

you are the better things will work and and a happy experience will prevail.

 

 

 

©2009 www.nobullrealestate.com.au